Christmas Goose

Excerpt from an email sent home on 27 December 2009.
To begin there are three butchers at Andersons—The elder, the son and young Lee who lives with the Andersons. They operate a small local butcher shop providing the community with heavenly meat and sausages. They have spoiled me rotten and I would not dream of buying my meat from anyone else.

Steve wanted a traditional Charles Dickens’s Christmas goose. I inquired of Lee about placing an order for a Christmas goose. After admitting I had never prepared a goose before he had to consult with Mr. Anderson (the elder) if they would even sell me an Andersons’ goose. The three debated with each other and the other customers if it was wise to have a novice prepare a goose without supervision. At first Mr. Anderson emphatically declared, “No, it was too risky.” I asked how was anyone to ever to learn how to prepare a goose if they were never allow to try… hum that presented an conundrum. Finally it was settled that I would be instructed on proper goose preparation in four lessons. Next to my name on the Christmas order sheet was written “Small Goose”.

Lesson One

Lee taught this first lesson on massaging the breast and preparing the cavity. My response was he needed a girl friend. Oh, and I added something along the lines that the goose was dead for goodness sake. Somehow even with my disparaging attitude I passed lesson one. IMPORTANT: Massage goose for 20 minutes to loosen the skin from the meat.

Lesson Two

Basically, it was a lengthy discussion between the three butchers and customers on dressing and recipes with a great deal of advice on how to manage the fat. There was heated debate on the varying methods. The elder Anderson felt strongly that his geese are so tasty because of all the fat. Therefore they produce too much fat for a proper dressing. I was advised to bake the “real” dressing on the side, stuffing the bird instead with a mixture of chopped apples, onions and potatoes to soak up fat. Afterwords this fat soaked dressing would be discarded. Heatedly debated was how full to stuff the cavity. Only consensus was that crammed full would certainly dry out the bird before it was fully cooked. Opinions differed on the value of piercing the center of the bird with a metal skewer to heat the inside of the bird so it will cook through before the point of being dry. Everyone wholeheartedly agreed that at all cost I was to avoid drying out the bird.

NOTE: I baked the dressing inside with some on the side using Nancy’s recipe. I was careful not to cram it in but loosely filled the bird.

Lesson Three

“Pricking” and managing the fat lesson had the entire store in an intense debate about the various approaches—Note the fat trend. Apparently the “pricking” has to be performed exactly right using a light enough touch to break the skin but not tear it. As if that was not enough to get people engaged, even stronger opinions were espoused as to when to prick. I came to understand the overall goal is to allow the fat to ooze or seep out, but not to flow out which would dry out the bird. The rest of the conversation was centered on gravy and storage of the left over fat. NOTE: I needed several containers ready to scoop the fat up. We ultimately used four that held two cups each of fat!

Please remember these conversations involved everyone gathered in the tiny store. As I was walking home last week, an older man, who had been in on the conversation at the butcher motioned me over and introduced me to his wife as the American, who is preparing her first “proper” Christmas goose. I now wave and say hello to them when I see them about the village green.

Lesson Four

I was excited when in the dark hours of Christmas Eve morning I squeezed into the brightly lit, packed shop to pick up my goose. The last lesson was on time and temperature. There was a complete but brief review of the previous three lessons. It was demanded by Mr. Anderson that I keep their phone number handy in case of an emergency. FOR THEIR GOOSE CANNOT BE ALLOWED TO DRY!

I paid 60 quid for 14 lbs (6.63 kilos) goose and endured endless debates about fat and breast massaging. We tested if my small goose would even fit in my oven once I got home. Luckily we found something to hold it. It took 2.5 hrs to cook at 190˚C in the oven. I scooped the fat out every 10-15 minutes. Every half hour I poured port wine over the goose.

My mom-in-Law Ruth joined us over the Christmas holidays. The three of us spent the entire afternoon drinking, eating, scooping fat and having quite a merry time. The goose turned out perfectly along with the rest of my holiday.

I live in a charming village in rural England. Cheers.

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“Say What?”
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